Reality

The realization knowing that I’m not getting any younger, nor is my waistline ever going to be as trim as I want it to be, my skin having lost the more youthful feel and waking up with nothing but aches and pains has me worried.

BUT YOU’RE YOUNG: So, you may say, oh, 34 is young, you have a long ways to go! But, do I? Really? What does that have to do with how I feel right now? I need to take action on that reality and do it before it takes me away.

FEELING AWFUL: I woke up this morning feeling just awful. Not wanting to do my hair (which, subsequently, I didn’t even bother to do). I picked out the first two things in my closet that matched, without so much as a second thought. I have been wearing the same pair of shoes to work since I started (in January), and I LOATHE them. My husband hates them, I hate them, and truth be told, they’re not that comfortable!

BARE MINIMUM: I jumped in the shower, only after debating the idea of showering for about 5 minutes as it was, and did the bare minimum … who does that? I made sure I was clean “enough” and hopped out. Got dressed, had some time to spare and used it to tend to the pets.

HAIRBALL: Now, that’s another topic in and of itself. I love my babies. My birds and cats are life!! So, when I noticed someone left a little hairball of a present for me, instead of tending to it and figuring out which cat it was, I begrudgingly THOUGHT TO MYSELF FOR A MINUTE, “SHOULD I JUST LEAVE THIS HERE ALL DAY”. WHOA! Stop right there. When you, a 34 year old woman “who has her whole life ahead of her“, asks if she should bother cleaning up a hairball…that’s a big friggin’ deal. Of course I picked it up, but I shook my head at myself, thinking, God, this can’t be normal. Which got me thinking about 500 other things.

I’m lucky I pre-bought my Keto lunches for the week or I’d have been screwed today.

On the flipside though, I am doing this AMAZING diet that I’ve been stuck on since January 16. Having gone from 186 to 151 (and as of today I sit at 154 … but don’t get me started on that, I’m already kicking my own ass about it). I haven’t given up or given in and I’ve continued to lose weight, for the first time in my life, and I’ve kept it off! I did let myself enjoy a first time dessert Sunday in Seattle, but that’s all a part of living your life. 

BACK TO THE TRAINWRECK: So to those of you who have it all together, those of you with 1, 2, 3, 4, 6 kids, work, have pets, homes, husbands, wives … how. How do you do it and stay sane? I’m serious. This is a cry for help for my own sanity!

NO MORE MEDS: I’ve been seeing therapists for well over a year to help with some of the other things going on, but I need to get away from the meds. I want to begin living holistically, naturally, with a purpose. Anyone who knows how to guide me in that direction? Leave a comment.

XO
TD

Advertisements

Author:

As a choreographer, staffing researcher, dance technique cleaning professional, writer, entrepreneur, pet lover, ketogenic lifestyle liver, wife, dance competition backstage management pro and avid reader, many things in my life somehow, someway turn into original works of art, thus, becoming 'Accidentally Original'. It really is my mantra in life, and while I tend to not proverbially fly by the seat of my pants, so many things in my life happen accidentally and they turn out to be original and always for the best. Thus - the birth of "Accidentally Original". Welcome to the stories, misadventures, wonders, reviews, 'revues' and more of me!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s